Prometheus 6

I didn't lift the whole post this time, but I feel the need to establish that not all Black women in interracial relationships are batshit crazy...not even most. In fact, I'll be discussing this post this weekend, I think.

Are White Men Saviors?

It seems in the BW/WM IR blogosphere, white men are this:

and black men are this:

I have been going to a black of pro BW/WM IR and black female empowerment blogs as of late and I have noticed this trend. The obsession with DBR black men. DBR= Damaged Beyond Repair. Why are we not concerned about avoiding DBR men whether they are white, black, asian, and anything in between? Why is it on pro IR sites we are even discussing black men? Why do we feel BM are the downfall of BW?

Right now there is an uproar about BM, they don't marry us, they run after non black women, and the black community doesn't give a damn about black women. It is true the BC in general doesn't rally around BW, but how does that affect me on a personal level? How does this affect IR? SOME BM don't marry us, they go to WW, AW, HW, but most black men don't marry and neither do most black women. Some of the black men we don't want to date any damn way, so why are we bitching and complaining about BM? I really don't get that at pro IR sites. I am in an IR with my husband and have been for about 8 years. Do you think me and him discuss the complexities of IR and how bad black men are that now black women are forced to date IR? Hell no!!!!

Number 1: black men don't figure into my relationship with my husband. What they do is neither here or there.
Number 2: I don't feel all black men are bad, not even most of them, not even half of them. I honestly believe you get what you take. If 50 cent type men are the only men coming after you, then you need to evaluate why. Where are you hanging at? Who do you surround yourself with? Why is every man you are with a father to 5 kids?

Maybe I was lucky, the majority of black men I grew up around were professional, educated, married men. They didn't all cheat, they didn't all have 4 different baby mommas. My mother didn't have multiple men in and out of the house. She and my father have been married for almost 35 years. I am almost 32, so yeah that means they waited to have kids AFTER married. Most the black people my parents surrounded me with were of the same type. Educated, married, with kids. My father didn't beat or cheat on my mother. He doesn't disregard her, in matter of fact he encouraged her to go back to school not once, but two times, once to get her undergrad and then once to get her masters. I just didn't see the DBR unless it was on television and later once I started college. Even then those men weren't DBR, they were just crazy, and knew their position in the community of BW vying for the small pool of educated black men out there.

Another thing I see is the expand your dating options, there are better men out there. This is 100% true. Women of all races should expand their dating options to increase their chances of finding a good guy. But expanding your dating options on some of these sites seems to equal white men will save you from the sorry ass black men out there. Just FYI I have dated some sorry ass WM in my time. Men who were just hanging out at home living off a trust fund. Men without cars, job, or education. Men who had Stepford wive motives for their women. Men who had Ike Turner tendencies. I had to weed my way through the dating jungle to find my husband, and my dating jungle persisted of mostly white men. To sum it up, sorry comes in every race.

Other downsides to dating white men: